Say 'yes' for a fulfilled retirement

Updated: 28 Jan 2025

In 2017, two years after the death of her husband, Sean, Cherryl Thomas decided to take early retirement, realising her priorities had changed without him. The 66-year-old now insists on getting the most out of life by saying ‘yes’ to as many opportunities as possible, including meeting new people and trying new things.

Plans for a busy retirement

In the build up to calling time on her near 40-year career, and with her sons, Ryan and Liam, having grown up, the former teacher from Buckley, North Wales, set about planning for her next chapter.

“I immediately began researching ‘preparing for retirement’ and reading articles, which definitely helped,” she said. “I am a planner by nature. Nothing makes me happier than writing a list and ticking things off it.

“I adopted a rescue farm dog, a Collie called Amber. Two walks a day is all the exercise I need. Sometimes I think it’s more than I need!

“I planned my finances and created my budgets. I knew what jobs I could tackle in the house and garden. I love reading so I visited several charity shops and bought enough novels to fill a small library! I even bought a keyboard, although I had not played the piano since I was 15.”

Cherryl Thomas, pictured right, with her sister, Irene, at an Oddfellows social event 

Between her many plans and spending at least three days a week with her aunt, Cherryl was as active and busy as ever.

Cherryl said: “I essentially became my aunt’s unofficial carer. She loved going out anywhere – shopping, for coffee, charity shops, a visit to the seaside. Sadly over the next few years her physical health declined and walking became more challenging.”

Her aunt’s health continued to deteriorate before she died peacefully in November 2022. This left Cherryl at a new juncture in her life. One she hadn’t planned for.

“I felt I was only now beginning my retirement.”

A new chapter

Now 65 and without her aunt to focus on for half the week, her time truly became her own.

“I felt I was only now beginning my retirement in 2023, six years after I left teaching,” she said.

“I was just taking every day as it came. If there was an opportunity to do something, I’d usually do it. Before I’d always have my mobile in my hand in case my aunt called because she needed me, but now I felt ‘I can do whatever I want today’, and I would usually take up any offers.”

Cherryl’s sister, Irene, had recently started attending a weekly coffee morning held in Saltney by a local friendship group, Deeside Oddfellows.

Having enjoyed herself and discovered the rewards to meeting up with other retirees socially, she suggested Cherryl came along.

...my first impressions was how friendly people were

Cherryl said: “To be honest I didn’t have any expectations. I thought it was just going to be like any coffee morning but my first impressions was how friendly people were.

“The weekly coffee mornings are a lovely supportive place. People feel safe to blossom. You know you’re part of a group of people who really appreciate friendship. We’re a very diverse group but when we meet we’re just friends. They’re the friends that you never met.

“There is unconditional acceptance. You don’t have to be of a certain standing. You turn up and they ask how you are and what you’ve been doing and they’re genuinely interested. It’s wonderful.

“Suffice it to say, it didn’t take long for me to become a member and going to the Oddfellows’ Thursday coffee morning is now in my diary as a weekly event. It is a lovely way to spend the morning.”

Full of praise

Cherryl couldn’t speak much higher of the people she’s met at Deeside Oddfellows, particularly Denise Turner and Caroline Davey, Branch Secretary and Social Organiser respectively.

“Both are always very friendly and approachable and clearly love what they do,” said Cherryl. “They are genuinely interested and active in helping members in every way they can.

“Denise is like a living book of knowledge about the Oddfellows but, more than just knowing, she puts the Oddfellows’ values into practice.

“Caroline is very organised, reminding members of forthcoming activities and costs, with options to pay a small amount weekly if anyone prefers, so there are no surprises for anyone.”

Getting out and about

Cherryl didn’t stop at attending the group’s coffee mornings, she found herself on its trips out and enjoying various lunches and other planned activities.

She said: “There’s a great variety of events, all organised for me. I only have to turn up.

“Every month there is at least one event planned, sometimes two, either locally or slightly further afield. By scheduling events on different days of the week, Caroline makes allowance for members who may be committed to other interests.

“If I’m not already committed to something on another day, I will sign up for an ‘Out and About’ event. My favourite one so far has been a mystery tour in Chester.”

Deeside Oddfellows brings members together to socialise across the region, including in and around Llandudno and at its new group location of Wrexham

Cherryl has also started attending her local Branch’s business meetings to learn more about how the Society, a non-profit and mutual, is run.

“In my job I used to go to a lot of meetings,” she said. “I’ve a keen interest in history so it was great to learn more about that, but also what it does today, like the charities it supports.”

Denise Turner, Branch Secretary at Deeside Oddfellows, said: “Cherryl, like many other of our members, is making the most of her retirement. It’s amazing what can happen when you embrace mixing with new people and trying new things.

“If you’d like to add a regular date in your diary, I’d encourage you to look up your local Oddfellows group. You’ll be certain of warm welcome.”

Cherryl’s top tips in retirement

Cherryl shared her top six tips on getting the most out of retirement:

• Plan something that you’re going to do with your time every day. Once the novelty wears off it’s easy to fall into a rut of doing the same things every day, ie doing nothing much. You will get bored! Decide what the right balance of staying at home and going out is for you. Sometimes to meet people, sometimes not. Buy a diary and use it to see how you’re spending your time and what ratio works best for you. Personally, I enjoy four days with something to look forward to outside of the home and three days at home doing jobs or enjoying hobbies.
• Start thinking about a hobby or interest you would like to pursue again such as playing the keyboard, or for the first time such a watercolour painting.
• Be open to making new friends. Be brave and join a club, sign up for a class or invite a neighbour around for coffee. I invite fellow dog walkers for coffee.
• Be positive and go out and try things. Start by checking out your local library and community centre. History society talks and craft fairs are always interesting.
• Don’t be negative. Look for the positive things in life. Every morning I think of three things I’m grateful for.
• Try to develop your IT skills. As well as allowing you to keep in touch with family and friends where ever they are, technology helps you to learn new things. I’ve become a great fan of YouTube DIY videos.

Oddfellows friendship groups

The Oddfellows can help you keep active and positive in your retirement, and introduce you to other retirees in your area. It has branches across the country and organises regular social events for its members to enjoy such as coffee mornings, talks and quizzes.

The Society also supports members with care and welfare advice, opportunities to holiday together and volunteering.

We're always ready to welcome new members to our local Oddfellows friendship groups.

You can find your nearest by using our Branch Finder, or use our Events Finder to search for social events and activities happening near to where you live or online.

Request your free information pack and local events diary by contacting us.