Easy routes to new friendships

Updated: 03 Mar 2025

There’s no shame in admitting you’d like more company or friends in your life. And acknowledging the need for greater connection is the first step to making a change for the better.

 

This is our latest message and forms part of a mini-campaign being run by our local friendship groups to encourage anyone looking to expand their social circle, for whatever the reason, to give one a try.

Friendly reassurance

In a recent survey,¹ some of the concerns expressed by Oddfellows members before trying their friendship group for the first time included walking into a room alone, worrying about fitting in, and having the confidence to leave the house in the first place.

Of the 138 members who shared their experiences, 77% said wanting to spend time with people was the main reason they initially headed along to an Oddfellows event, followed by 65% who were looking to build a new circle of friends, and 59% who said they were keen to get out of the house more.

It’s important to socialise with people outside of family and close friendship groups because it gives you another perspective on life. Joan Williams, Brighouse and Huddersfield Oddfellows member

Almost all of those who responded (98%) also agreed that it’s important to regularly participate in interesting activities in later life, with the most cited reason being to keep the mind and body active.

Not alone

“These figures show that people are not alone in how they feel. A huge number of our members have experienced the need for company,” said Debra Haley, Secretary for Halifax Branch, which is one of 96 branches of the Oddfellows nationwide.

“You can find yourself wanting more connection for many reasons in later life. It could be that you’ve retired and have more free time on your hands, you’ve lost a partner or lost touch with existing friendships, or you’ve relocated,” added Debra. 

“It’s essential for humans to socialise and to spend time with others and acknowledging this need is the first step. However, knowing what steps you can take to meet new people as an adult is often the first stumbling block. That’s where we come in.”

Group walks are popular with members, often with a pub lunch afterwards

Organised and hosted events

Oddfellows friendship groups are made up of mostly older and retired people, and total around 38,800 members nationally.

Each month, Oddfellows branches up and down the country host around 750 in-person and online events to give people easy routes to mix with others, and to take part in a wide variety of interesting activities. 

The Oddfellows has an Events Finder on its website for anyone interested in finding out what’s happening near to them. Around 60 free online social events are also hosted through Zoom each month which are open to the general public.

Added Debra: “We’ll gladly send you a list of what events are coming up so you can take a look at what appeals to you. Just get in touch.

“We’ve a great bunch of people in our group who come along on their own, as a couple, or with friends, and there’s always a designated host who will look out for you. Everything is organised, so you just need to turn up and enjoy yourself.” 

Taking part in our group’s activities keeps me young and busy doing things. Looking at the same four walls is not for me. I wish I had joined years ago. Beryl Derbyshire, St Helens and Warrington Oddfellows member

 
Catching up over coffee is a regular fixture on our branches' social calendars

Helpful tips and advice

As part of the survey, members also gave their top tips on trying out a new social group. Here are some of the most popular pieces of practical and emotional advice:

• Stay open-minded and ask questions
• Say hello to everyone you meet, even if it's only when you're waiting for a cup of tea
• Know that everyone is friendly, so not to be nervous
• Try to speak to the event host before and, if you can, check out the venue ahead of time
• Don't worry. Just be brave and take that first step. You'll see some of the same faces each time so they'll soon become friends
• If you don't try you'll never know. There's nothing to lose. Go for it. It will be OK. If it's not for you, that's OK
• Know that everyone is very friendly and you'll be welcomed
• Know the anticipation is always worse than your experience
• Pick something you like doing and focus on enjoying it
• Enter the room with a smile, make eye contact and introduce yourself
• Find an event like a walk where you can talk about your surroundings or a quiz where you can talk about the questions

Encouraging messages from members

Jan Brett, Halifax Oddfellows

Jan, who joined Halifax Oddfellows just over a year ago, shared: “It’s easy to put things off and to stay in, so having something in your diary is important.

“The Oddfellows come up with all the different event ideas, so you just head along and enjoy yourself. I’ve met some wonderful people.”

Reassuring anyone nervous about trying an Oddfellows event, Jan added: “You can always chat with the host before. Don’t worry about whether you’ll fit in. Just come along. You've nothing to lose!”

Cheryll Davey, Ipswich Oddfellows

Cheryll joined Ipswich Oddfellows so she could add a few more interesting activities to her diary. 

She shared: "Everyone needs to remain active as much as possible and we all need new friends. I was introduced to the Oddfellows by a friend and it’s been the best thing ever.

"I was worried about whether I’d fit in but everyone is so warm and welcoming. It's fun, relaxing – everyone talks to you. It's great.”

Chrissie Beckett, Grenville Oddfellows

Chrissie became part of Grenville Oddfellows just over two years ago where her husband, Dave, was already a member. Having interesting activities to take part in and getting to know more people in the area are two of many reasons Chrissie is now part of the group.

Chrissie explained: “It’s vital to keep active and have interests outside the home. Also, it’s important to mix with others, which alleviates the possibility of loneliness and keeping the mind active promotes wellbeing and good health. The Oddfellows has provided all aspects of these for me.”

Encouraging others to give the Oddfellows a try, she added: “You can bring someone along with you, but you will soon make new friends!”

All are welcome at an Oddfellows meetup such as this homemade cake event at Halifax Oddfellows

Oddfellows social events and activities

Oddfellows social events are an easy way to add something interesting to your day. All hosted and organised by our local friendship groups, you can be sure of a warm welcome.

Take a look at what's coming up and give one a try.

• You'll find chances to meet friendly people and to make new connections in your local community.
• Enjoy regular social events and always have something in your diary to look forward to.
• Discover new interests and give a variety of activities a go in welcoming company.

You can also read our guide on what to expect at an Oddfellows social event.

Request a free local events diary

To find out more about Oddfellows membership, and to order a free local events diary, visit the request an info pack page.

¹Online research was conducted by the Oddfellows using SurveyMonkey between 20 to 28 January 2025. 138 Oddfellows members (aged 18+) responded.