Give your retirement a 'glow-up'

Updated: 27 May 2025

Switching from a ‘To Do’ to a ‘To Be’ mindset is the key to helping retirees get the retirement ‘glow-up’ they deserve. This is the latest message from the Oddfellows.

Retirement is the perfect opportunity to focus on your ‘inner glow’

Retirement should be a time to shake life up, not sit back, but we believe far too many retirees get stuck in a retirement rut and miss out on the richer life they should be living. 

Backed by ‘Doctor of Happiness’ Dr Andy Cope, the Oddfellows is encouraging retirees to give their retirement a ‘glow-up’ by focusing on living fully and authentically, prioritising who you want to be rather than ticking off a task list. 

Shift from 'when' to 'now'

Dr Cope, who has spent two decades studying the science of positive psychology and human flourishing, said: “Retirement is the perfect opportunity to have a psychological spring clean, and to shift our mindset from ‘when’ to ‘now’.  

“Too often, we spend our lives chasing goals, which means we can accidentally kick our happiness into the long grass. For example, you think you’ll be happy when your children are older, when you move to a bigger house, when you get a different job, etc. But being happy is about living with purpose and focusing on what truly matters to you, right here, right now. 

“With retirement, you can fall into the trap of only creating ‘To Do’ lists and they are often quite mundane tasks, and they tend to run out once you’ve ticked off that holiday, or you’ve sorted out the house or garden. But if you make the switch to asking yourself what you want ‘To Be’ today, it’s incredibly powerful and rewarding.” 

With the aid of Dr Cope, the Oddfellows hopes to make the creation of post-work ‘To Be’ lists the norm, so people can focus on experiences rather than actions for increased excitement and later life fulfilment. 

Focus on who you want to be

Dr Cope said: “Everyone’s ‘To Be’ list is different. Thinking about what kind of person you want to be gives you focus. For example, if you want to be a nice person, then you need to be kind, compassionate and present for those around you. If you want to be more adventurous, spend the day focusing on being curious and bold, and give new things a try.

“Thinking in this way shapes how you are going to react to the events of the day, gives you more resilience and brings more joy.” 

Further reading: Blog by Dr Andy Cope, 'Spring clean' to shine in retirement

The Oddfellows is one of the UK’s largest friendly societies. Its 96 branches across the UK host around 750 in-person and online events and group activities each month which offer opportunities for its near 40,000 members to focus on doing the things they enjoy, from social coffee mornings and talks, to day trips and holidays. 

Brian (pictured second from left) with the friends he's made in retirement at St Helens and Warrington Oddfellows

Brian Monks, 73, from Ashton-in-Makerfield, Wigan, retired eight years ago and joined his local St Helens and Warrington Oddfellows friendship group last year. A shopkeeper of 25 years, he missed having regular chances to chat with people from all walks of life.

Brian said: “I didn’t miss the work one bit, but I missed the customers and the people I was working with. It was a local shop and you got to know everyone and their families. I’m a sociable person. I enjoy meeting people, talking to people and having a bit of fun.”

This need to stay socially connected to his community was the key reason he headed along to an Oddfellows event. 

...the group of people you meet are very mixed. For me, that’s interesting and rewarding.

Brian added: “Now that I’m retired and have more free time I wanted to expand my circle of friends, enjoy a range of activities and be somewhere I could just be myself.

“When I went along to my first event, I was made so welcome and the group of people you meet are very mixed. For me, that’s interesting and rewarding. I’m so glad I joined as I thoroughly enjoy spending time with the group and have made many wonderful new friends. I’ve even started shadowing the committee to hopefully get more involved in the running of my Branch as a volunteer.”

Jane Nelson, the Oddfellows’ CEO, said: “Retirement isn’t just about finishing work. It’s your chance to re-invent, re-energise and start living life like you mean it. That means new friends, new adventures and a new perspective.

“Our local friendship groups are here to help you explore what’s possible in retirement – at your own pace and in your own way. You’ll find friendly faces, interesting events, chances to volunteer, and group holidays to look forward to. There’s also wellbeing advice and plenty of opportunities to feel more connected in your community.

“No matter what you need to help you flourish, the Oddfellows can help you glow in retirement.”

Groups to help you glow

The Oddfellows, a not-for-profit and mutual, was established in 1810 to support workers and their families through difficult times. It continues to provide a community united by friendship, care and charitable support.

In addition to attending regular social events, members can access financial benefits and welfare support, with a dedicated care helpline and citizens advice team, and a travel club.

Free 'Thrive in Retirement' online event

To learn more about how to give your retirement a ‘glow-up’, join us for this inspiring free online event with Dr Cope on Tuesday 1 July at 7pm.

Open to anyone, Dr Cope will share powerful insights on how to thrive in retirement by living with purpose and focusing on what truly matters. With his trademark blend of warmth, humour, and down-to-earth wisdom, this talk promises to leave you uplifted, motivated, and ready to embrace all the possibilities of this exciting chapter of life.

Oddfellows friendship groups

The Oddfellows can help you stay active and positive in your retirement, and introduce you to other retirees in your area. It has branches across the country and organises regular social events for its members to enjoy such as talks, group trips and quizzes.

The Society also supports members with care and welfare advice, opportunities to holiday together and volunteering.

We're always ready to welcome new members to our local Oddfellows friendship groups.

You can find your nearest by using our Branch Finder, or use our Events Finder to search for social events and activities happening near to where you live or online.

There are also regular online open days to find out more about the Society and the benefits of membership.

Request your free information pack and local events diary by contacting us.

About Dr Andy Cope

Andy is a keynote speaker, best-selling author and ‘recovering academic’. A regular on radio and TV, he specialises in positive psychology and the science of human flourishing. The reward for grinding out his PhD is that Andy gets to call himself a Dr of Happiness.

Andy’s mission is to change the narrative and re-focus psychology away from what’s wrong with people to what’s right. His messages act as a gentle nudge towards people taking charge of their own mental health. 

His work is showcased at www.artofbrilliance.co.uk 

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